1. How did you meet?
We met in college during first semester, but we didn’t become good friends until third semester. One day I was sitting on a couch in the library finishing an assignment when he plopped down next to me and began talk to me. We shared some small talk for awhile and since then we hit it off.
2. How old were you when you got engaged? How old are you and Gerard?
That winter of 2009 when I got engaged I was 22 years old. I turned 23 that spring (2010), so that following winter when I got married I was 23 years old. I just turned 24 years old this past spring (2011). Gerard is a year older than me. (now in retrospect I feel like we got engaged sooo young!)
3. What has been the most challenging change you’ve faced since you got married?
The biggest challenge I’ve dealt with is living with a man!! I grew up as an only child and even though I had male cousins, nothing compare to actually living with a guy. Heterosexual or gay, when they walk around the house in a towel or boxers it makes me feel like I’m a hysterical teenager again. Lol. Also the typical guy stuff of finding their cloths thrown around the room…ugh! I think in general the most challenging thing for me was learning to live with someone else and learning to be independent. In Gerard’s case I think the most challenging change he’s had to face is coming home to someone who’s always worried about where he is and what he’s been up to. He wasn’t ever used to having someone always waiting for him “at home”. He came and went as he wished. Now he has the responsibility of checking-in.
4. Hi! You never told us about the rest of the furnishing in your home. Are there still unfurnished parts in your house?
We haven’t finished furnishing the house. We put together different areas of the house as best as we can. Right now we are saving up for a nice dining room table, and nicer sofas for the TV room. I think the only rooms which are about 90% done are the bedrooms, office and the garage. (the garage wasn’t too hard to get done. We just painted the walls and installed shelves to put all the junk we didn’t want in the house!)
5. Is there any habit you can’t stand about each other?
His burping. I can never stand his spontaneous burps. He burps after drinking soda or after a meal. I’m also having a hard time dealing with his habit of caring plates of snacks around the house and leave the plates and cups randomly spread out around the house. The one habit that Gerard can’t stand about me is my neurotic control-freak self. He says I get too intense and I’m dramatic about little things. He’s spontaneous and I prefer to have e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g planed! So he hates when I freak out when things don’t turn out as planned.
6. Any plans for children?
Gosh, no! Not yet and probably not anytime soon. Work keeps us busy and truthfully we haven’t even discussed that possibility. We both want children at some point in our life, just not right now.
7. You both seem to be pretty successful, Is there any power struggle in our marriage?
Sometimes we argue over money issues. We both try and do the best in our jobs and sometimes our ego gets in the way of wanting to be the person that makes the most money. But most of the time we are ok with the amount each other brings in. I like saving, while Gerry likes getting the money and spending it. So we argue a lot in that aspect.
8. You married your best friend for the wrong reasons and yet you think you are in a successful marriage? It’s blasphemy and sacrilegious what you have done.
Ok, so this wasn’t a question, but I get comments like this a-l-o-t! At first those comments bothered me and made me feel horrible. However, I don’t completely believe we got married for the ‘wrong’ reasons or that we don’t have a good marriage (so far). I’ll quote what http://marriage.lifetips.com once wrote: “Research suggests that successful marriages have the following six components: appreciation and affection, commitment, positive communication, time together, spiritual well-being, and the ability to cope with the stress and crisis.” Indeed no marriage is 100% perfect. Or at least I haven’t seen any marriage like that. I’d like to believe that what Gerard and I have is a positive thing. We are close and honest with one another.
9. Do you and Gerry really always agree on stuff?
No! In fact I think there is a lot we don’t always agree on. I don’t write everything we agree or disagree on. We have learned to pick our battles and let some things slide. We’re still learning. We may have been close friends for 3 years, but once we started living together we learned A LOT more about each other. (skeleton in the closets and all…)
10. Do you have time out in your marriage?
Errr… I guess? We argue and try and fix it in that moment. If we do have time-outs, it’s not done consciously. Lol. I’ve never understood the concept of “honey, I’m really angry at you and I can see you are angry at me. Let’s take a break and come back to this argument later.” I think Gerard and I prefer to talk it out immediately instead of prolonging the argument. Time-outs might work with certain arguments, but not all of them.
11. Is there anything your in-laws do that bug you?
Up until now….no, not really. This year they have kind of let us be on our own and not intervene too much. I’ll probably come back to this question later because I was thinking of something my mother-in-law does that bugs me! But now I can’t what it was…
TOP 10 FAQ! I’ll have a part II later. I get a lot of questions I couldn't upload them all here at the same time! :) But I think it will be fun to have them in Parts.
Hope you enjoyed!
Xoxo
Desirae
