Its midnight and I just got back from a nice dinner with friends. A former literature classmate, Grace, had her birthday party dinner tonight. She organized it all today and amazingly every one of our friends was able to attend.
The celebration took place in small bar. I’m not much of an alcohol drinker. (Since I don’t drink much or often I am an easy drunk. Haha) I prefer a simple soda. It’s hard for me to admit sometimes, but the only alcoholic drinks I’ll actually consume are the mixed drinks that Gerard makes for me. I trust him and since the first moment we met he knew exactly how much I was able to hold in my system before getting silly.
Tonight however it felt weird getting together with “our” friends without Gerry there. He texted me when he arrived to his destination. He was visiting an out of town designer that lives/works 2hrs away from here. He drove up and will be back tomorrow. I forward the text to Bryce so he would also be updated. While talking on the phone I mentioned the birthday party and he offered to accompany me. I couldn’t have been more thrilled!! He is great company and it’s nice to have someone else to talk too. Most of my friends usually bring their boyfriends and the evening starts with everyone interacting, but an hour later everyone is just talking with their boyfriends. I would have felt uncomfortable sitting alone.
Bryce and I met at the restaurant that evening. He’s just gotten off work and was wearing his black pants with a blue checkered shirt. He looked professional and older than his actual age, 25.
I wore my favorite brown V top with just one shoulder, my favorite skinny jeans along with brown high heels. I was feeling very attractive.
Bryce’s first comment when he saw me was “You look hot.” That was such a compliment! I’m sure I blushed. He sat next to me during the entire evening and we talked about everything going on in our lives. He does one thing that used to bother me, but now I’m used to it. He runs his fingers through my long hair. Gerry does that a lot; he was the one that started it. I didn’t mind it at all when it came to him doing that. But when Bryce started I felt a bit uncomfortable, as if he was “stealing” Gerry’s “move”. Haha . Now I don’t realize it and I allow my wild insecure imagination to go free elsewhere.
There are very few gestures that I allow Gerry to do and no one else. I'll mention at least two..
1) Kisses on the forehead….ugh! I hated them until Gerry did it once and it was actually comforting. He does that once in awhile and it no longer bothers me.
2) Have someone put their arm around me--- Since I was about 9 years old I’ve had tumors come out on different parts of my body. Mainly my back and arms. I’ve had more than 12 surgeries to extract them. Luckily none of them are dangerous. Unfortunately my skin scars easily so I have lines and scares all over my back and upper arm. I have a slash on the left side of my neck. For years I never wore short sleeves or halters. I was always covered up. I didn’t want anyone to touch or see me. Then Gerry came along and somehow my scars disappeared with him.
Sometimes Bryce has that same effect in giving my confidence where I lack it…
But anyway, I’m not going into that subject of my insecurity. It’s too long and complicated and I don’t feel like writing about today. Through the good days and bad days, I have a nice support team. I am here for them and they are there for me.
Back at the party Bryce and I congratulated Grace on her birthday and then found out there was another reason for the celebration. She’d gotten engaged over the weekend! I’m very happy for her. She’s been in a relationship with her boyfriend, currently fiancé, since they were 17 years old. Now six years later he’s taking her to the altar! Her wedding is going to be huge and glamorous. Its fun to see my other friends getting married and planning a future with their loved ones.
I know my moment will be coming sooner than I know it. I guess seeing Grace plan her future got Bryce thinking about how lucky we seem to have it.
I hear a couple remarks from friend telling me it looked wrong that I went to a party with my husband's Best Man. but then I have to remind them that Bryce was also my best friend.
However I did think about it and maybe next time I'll invite a gal friend, just so there aren't any unwanted rumors.
xoxo
Desirae
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